Monday, January 27, 2014

Life Changes

2013 will always be considered one of the best years of my life. It was full of memories, and life changing events. Luckily, more good than bad :) If you would have told me last January that in one year I would have a 3 month old, I would have laughed in your face. But, here I am-- a mom of an adorable, precious, and studly little boy that I couldn't love more if I tried.

Last February I had this constant nausea, I had no idea what was wrong with me. It is crazy, I can remember Ted coming home late one night from basketball, and he came in to talk with me. I started out our conversation just fine and about 45 minutes later the sickness hit me. I thought I just needed to get some sleep. Well, long story short, it never went away and the whole time Ted told me I was pregnant. We weren't trying, and at the time we didn't have insurance so I was really freaking out. He went and bought a pregnancy test, and we were a little unsure if the results meant I was pregnant. The second line was so faint so we weren't sure how to respond.. Part of me wondered if the faint line was just a pigment of my imagination. Of course we turned to trusty Google, and everything we read said "2 lines=pregnant" no matter how light or dark it may be. But we just didn't want to get our hopes up. Even though we tried to hold it in, we started getting really excited. We stayed up all night talking about our little baby, names, and plans for the future. I couldn't stop looking at all the nursery ideas on Pinterest, and I scrolled through the baby clothes on so many websites.

We went to the mall the next day, and I have never noticed so many pregnant women. They were everywhere. And they all seemed so happy. It was then that I realized how badly I wanted to be one of them! I was ready for this experience. It's a crazy thing, taking a pregnancy test. I had so many emotions.. If it was positive, was I ready? Could we handle this change!? Would we know how to care for a newborn!? If it was negative, I knew I would be disappointed. All I have ever wanted to be in life was a wife and a mom! So we couldn't handle the uncertainty any more and we bought a digital test. We were beyond excited when "Pregnant" showed up. It was real, we were becoming a family of 3!

It was hard for me to believe. Even though Ted and I were getting ready to celebrate 3 years together, I didn't know if I was ready to share him. As selfish as that sounds, it's true. Don't get me wrong, I couldn't be more grateful for this experience to have a baby with the love of my life, but it was a lot to take in. My sweet husband was my rock through the first few, difficult months. Well actually throughout the whole pregnancy. When I had my breakdowns he constantly reminded me how blessed we were, and that if it we were meant to have a baby now, we would. Even if we weren't quite sure.

That Valentine's Day we made our usual fort {kind of my favorite tradition}, and my heart had never been so happy knowing that we were going to be sharing our fort with our little babe the next year. It was an amazing 9 months of pregnancy. Words can't describe how special that experience is. I thought I loved my husband A LOT before, but it doesn't even compare to my love for him now. And holy cow, that baby we made? I've never been more proud of anything in my life.

1 comment:

Lexie and Brayden said...

This is such a sweet post :) you have such a cute family. Thanks for sharing your experience :)